you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Randomize
