Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
