Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
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