Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
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