Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
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