I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
there was a trapeze. enough said
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
God gave him joint rollers for hands
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize