Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
Best friends brother. Beat that.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
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