oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Randomize
