it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
