your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
Randomize