She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
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