there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Randomize