Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
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