doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
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