Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
