office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Randomize
