how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
