dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
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If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
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I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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