No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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