Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
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