a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Randomize