is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
