You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I need to calm my uterus...
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize