quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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