so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
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