no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
