This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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