I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
Randomize