Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
home. puking in laundry basket.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
