just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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