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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
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