You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
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