yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
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