I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Randomize