This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
apparently the secret to your success is patron
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
Contemplating These 27 Questions Will Make Your Brain Explode
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
25 People Confess The Most Shocking Things They’ve Ever Seen In Public
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.