Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
