physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
