I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements