so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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