whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
