sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
My feet surprised me
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