please come you make the beer taste better
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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