Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Randomize