i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize
