My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize
