it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Randomize
