I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize