therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Randomize
