is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
I enjoy the company of your penis
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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