So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
Randomize
