Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
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